HEAVEN

a guy dies and goes to heaven. St, Peter explains him:
-here in heaven we live like in a gigantic nudist camp but we have one rule that is meant to never be broken, we must have no sex at all, if you ask any woman here she won't say 'no' but be careful of not breaking the rule 'cause the first time you do, angel will come and will whip your balls, the second time you do, the angel will come along too and they will hit your balls with chains and if you do it a third time your dick is gonna be cuted off
-well, think that anyway I have no chance to argue.
the guy enters heaven and he sees beatiful ladies here and beatiful ladies there but he resist to try to talk about sex with any of them as much as he can until one day he can resist no more and as soon as he finish the angels come and whip his balls.
a long time goes by and he breaks the rule again with the already known consequences.
after a long while he makes the third and he is notified where to go thru' a telegram.
he follows the instructions and finds a long waining row and when he approaches hears the talking of the angel
who's doing the task and he just can't help starting to laugh loudly
the angel asks to the guy he has to execute
-tell me, what was your job when you were alive?
-I was a lumberjack
then the angel turns to another angel who is the assisstant and tells him
-go, bring me an axe.
the row continues and the angel asks to the next guy
-what was your job during your life?
-I was a carpenter
then he asks the other angel:
-go, bring me a saw.
our subject laughs louder and louder and it comes his turn, then the angel asks:
-you, who laughs so much, tell, what was your job?
-I used to sell candies, so, suck it until it's over.